Effusive Eli

Eli has had some major life events happen lately.  First a new baby, then a trip to Disney World (minus his parents) and now he's out of first grade.  He has taken to his new role of big brother wonderfully and is so sweet and helpful.   Here are some Eli moments that have happened recently...well maybe some not so recently but I wrote them down so I wouldn't forget and that's pretty good in my opinion.

Today Eli said "Mom, do you think life is pretty hard when Knox cries a lot like he did today?" (Knox has been pretty fussy.)
Me: "oh no, it's just a way for him to get his energy out. If we try to feed him and change him and hold him and he's still fussy then we just can let him cry."
Eli: "well, I just wanted you to know that you can always ask me for help."

That is typical Eli. He's SO SWEET.  He seriously is so caring and thoughtful.

At the store yesterday I was buying a bunch of yogurts and Eli was shocked and excited.  "why are you buying so much yogurt?! You never buy so much yogurt!"  Then I let him get a donut and he was even more surprised, "What's gotten into you?! You never buy so much good stuff. This is the kind of mom I like."  Apparently I'm usually some sort of ogre when it comes to grocery shopping. This sort of benevolent behavior continued though because today I made him a s'more in the microwave. Tonight when I was kissing him goodnight he said, "you seen to be feeling really good.  You made me a s'more and you came downstairs with me" (we played a video game for 10 minutes or less...haha) "I don't know what's gotten into you but I like it."

Stewart recently watched Eli (this was pre-Knox) and when I came home Eli knew all sorts of great things like how to pants people, how to keep from getting pantsed, and what mooning is all about. I was lamenting this sort of behavior and Eli proclaimed, "awww I just LOVE what that guy teaches me."

When Eli found out that his Aunt Leesa had a boyfriend (now fiance) and they kissed he said "I can't believe she finally let a boy touch her lips!"  Ha ha Leesa was known to be scared of boys until recently.

Eli's uncle Jed is in high school and apparently saw some girls fighting one day. On facebook he posted about it and I was reading the post to Stewart. Eli was there and heard and asked a few questions about it. He thought about it for a minute and then said, "hmm that must have been interesting to see some chicks fight."

 

Eli is a sweet little guy who still loves his mom. He asked me if we could do something together just us because I'm always taking care of Knox. I love that Eli isn't afraid to show his love for his mommy.

Effusive Eli:

Stewart was in charge last night and they were watching Futurama. At 9:00 Stewart said:

Stew: guess what time it is.
Eli: time to watch more Futurama?
Stew: No
Eli: Time to watch more Futurama while we make a treat?
Stew: No
Eli: Time to stay up and have more fun?
Stew No it's time for bed.
Eli: is it time to go to sleep or is it time to get in bed and read?

Of course Stewart let him read until 9:45. He's a huge sucker. I put Eli in bed between 8 and 8:30 and let him read until 9. But a late night for Eli is worth a girls night out for me!

I was playing Yahtzee on my iPod
Eli:what are you playing?
Me: Yahtzee.
Eli: oh Nazi
Me: No, Yahtzee
Eli: OH! Nazi.
Me: (imagining him going to school telling people I play Nazi and getting panicked) NO YAH-tzee, YAH-tzee.
Eli: oh Yahtzee. Yeah I think I've played that before.

Eli loves a girl at school. He calls her "my girlfriend that I don't date."

On Monday Eli was helping me sort through the baby clothes. He said "can I be the second one in the family to hold the baby. I told him that Dad would be there so he would be second but that Eli could be the first visitor come see the baby at the hospital. Eli said "well can I be the 3rd one in our family to hold the baby?" Ha ha. I told him he can be the 3rd one in our family to hold the baby and since Knox can't hold himself I think that will work out ok.

Man, there was another really funny thing Eli said but now I can't remember! I need to get used to remembering these things since they are my favorite posts to go back and read.

Chatting

Eli has taken to chatting online. I have always believed that children need as much free access to the Internet as possible at the age of six. OK that's not really true. If I chat Eli likes to sneak in and take over. The first time was with my brother and Eli did it without any prompting from me. Today he chatted with Stewart for a few minutes but I did tip him off that Stewart was online.

9:59 AM me: hi mi name is eli

10:00 AM Stewart: hi eli!

my name is daddy

10:01 AM me: hi i mistu

Stewart: I miss you too

I love you so much

10:04 AM me: no i love you so much

10:05 AM Stewart: are you going to school today?

10:07 AM me: ok I'm back


Eli is pretty much awesome...in my humble opinion. ;)


Next up: get Eli his own email account.

Effusive Eli:

This week is DARE week at school. I don't actually know if that's what they still call it but it's the week they teach kids to say no to drugs.

After only ONE day Eli is very prepared if "any one offers him alcohol or tobacco." What he will do is turn his back on the offender. He gave me a preview of this and here's how it went:

Me: Eli, have some tobacco (he keeps saying tobacco. So formal.)
Eli: *puts his arms in his shirt and turns it around. He looks very brave and proud of himself*
I'm now looking at the back of his shirt and he doesn't look like he's ready to walk away.
Me: *trying not to laugh* um that's not really what you should do. Let me show you.

I then showed him how to actually turn around and walk away. He smiled and said "oh I didn't know that's what they meant."

Ha ha I guess someone said something about "showing them the back of your shirt" or something. It was SO funny.

Building Bears

With Stewart gone, Eli has had to find another sucker to buy him things. I have stepped up to the plate. Eli got a coupon for build a bear and I told him he could choose some clothes or something. But I caved and let him get a bear. He chose the cute panda and is SO happy with it.

One of the things that I love about Eli is that he can be SUCH a boy! A little stinky, rough, crazy boy. BUT he can also be a sweet little guy who loves to cuddle and watch movies with his mommy.

Eli LOVES school and his favorite thing to say now is, "I love school. I like it much more than church." The sad thing is that I'm his teacher and he's my naughtiest child.

Effusive Eli:

Eli is the proud owner of a "golden tooth." After visiting the dentist recently Eli was proud to show EVERYONE including strangers the visual proof of my failings as a mother. He has a silver filling that he's sure will fetch him a 20 dollar reward when the tooth fairy visits in a few years. When his cousin wished for a silver tooth too and wondered why Eli got one? Eli replied, "because I was so good at the dentist."

I guess that's better than Eli crying over a silver tooth though. When Eli's little cousin gave him a fat lip, he cried and cried because he thought he looked ugly.

When the same little cousin was crying face to face with Eli he said "mom, get him out of my face! He's crying in my face." Crying children stress Eli out way bad.

Eli's grandpa gave him and his cousins pocket knives on Sunday. It was about the best day of their lives. To showcase the wonderful attributes of the knives Brooklyn and Eli put on an infomercial. Some of the things that you can accomplish with the knives are sawing wood, cutting things, and killing bears.

Effusive Eli:

All these conversations took place today before 3:00

While talking about the death of Michael Jackson today Eli had some questions:
Eli: how did Michael Jackson die?
Becca: Well, he made some bad choices and took bad drugs.
E: not the good kind a doctor gives you.
B: Nope just bad ones.
E: were they the bad kind that make you have big muscles and look scary (meaning steroids)
B: no they weren't that kind.
E: I can't wait until Carrot Top dies.

I never blogged about Vegas but we stayed at the Luxor where Carrot Top performs. The posters that were EVERYWHERE freaked Eli out. Stewart told him how Carrot Top looks so freaky because he takes steroids.

Eli is obsessed with Legos.

E: I can't wait until I'm an adult.
B: Oh really why?
E: weeeell you might not like this when I tell you.
B: you can tell me.
E: well when I'm an adult and you die I'm going to buy the Lego Deathstar.
B: you don't have to wait until I'm dead to buy it. I'm just not going to buy it for you. You can buy it whenever you have enough money.
E: OH!

Eli: I just can't believe that Michael Jackson is dead! When I grow up I'm going to be his number one fan. Then I'll go see him.
Becca: you can't see him he's dead.
E: well I CAN dig up his body!

Effusive Eli:

Eli has had a few good one lately.

While Eli was telling his aunts about his "kissing conquests" one of them said, "eww don't kiss girls! Don't you know they have cooties?" Eli said, "what are cooties? Are they what sick out like this?" (Now imagine him with his hands in crab claws and his fingers on his chest.)

Eli went to the birthday party of said "kissing conquest." When I picked him up I asked him if he was nice to all the kids and he said that he had been nice and that he only got into ONE fight over Elizabeth. He must have really showed restraint because he was quite proud of himself that it was only one fight.

We recently went to Mayfield (post coming soon.) When we got there I asked Eli if he was happy to be in Mayfield. He replied, "yes, sometimes I just need to get out of that house."

While in Richfield we went to Lance's store. Well everyone knew baby Asher. At first, Eli was surprised that everyone knew his name. Then he was a little jealous at the celebrity that Asher was experiencing. Finally one lady said "hi" to Eli and he said, "my name is Eli, you can tell everyone else." He never did get the same attention though! A plethora of people yelling Eli's name. That is his idea of heaven.

Playing with Photoshop

Effusive Eli:

Eli has been a little sweetheart since Stewart has been gone. (I will blog about Vegas once Stewart send me the pics.)

While I was sewing a tooth pillow, Eli came in the house and said that he had a surprise for me. I told him that I was sewing a tooth pillow for him and he said, "oh how sweet."

He then took me down to my room where he had taped the picture to the left on the my wall. He even taped a little flower on it. He said it was so I wouldn't be so sad about daddy being gone. He also comes up and cuddles me so that I "won't feel so sad about daddy being gone." It's his way of telling me that he's sad about Stewart being gone without saying it.

At dinner the other night my dad was talking Eli into liking the soup we were having because it had all the things Eli liked. I told Eli that we could make a soup of chocolate, shrimp, and cheese. Eli looked at me disgusted and said, "is there really a soup like that?" I said no, but that we could make it up and what did he think about that? He said "ok, but you have to be the first one to taste it." I thought that that was pretty quick thinking.

Effusive Eli:

For St. Patrick's day I made Eli his favorite breakfast, which is breakfast in bed. Unfortunately, I dyed the eggs green.

Eli looked on in disgust, tried them and then told me that his brain commanded him not to eat the eggs. I can't say that I blamed him because they looked disgusting.

Eli also told me that he thinks "stupid" is the boss of all the naughty words. I think it's because it his favorite naughty word to say.

My dad is a big-time gardener. BUT he has a "partner" now. As far as Eli is concerned my dad better not forget that. When my dad went out on a cold day to screen dirt Eli was a little frantic that he wasn't told about that. When my dad came in Eli said, "Did you plant anything?" When the answer was "no." Eli said "you better not plant without me."

On Sunday Eli was talking to my dad about anything that he could think of. When Eli is talking to one person like this you can't help them. If you try to deflect Eli's attention to give reprieve to his target he'll say, "I'm talking to Grandpa." So, among other things, Eli was asking my dad who the best golfer in the world was. When my dad said Tiger Woods was, Eli carefully mentioned that his other grandpa was probably the best golfer in the world.

When Eli realized that he will be starting kindergarten. He looked a little freaked out. He said, "but I can't go to kindergarten! I'm only 5 and it will be too hard!" When I told him that he can already read and count so that it wouldn't be hard he looked a little relieved.

We are just loving every second with Eli. He's such a loving, funny little guy. Eli has a tough time coming up with his daddy leaving but I think that he'll be a little trooper. He loves his Daddy so much and thinks that he's so tough and cool.

Effusive Eli

I've noticed that Eli will be talking to me and I answer "uh huh" and "really" and after about 15 minutes he's still going strong and I have no idea what he's talking about! It makes me feel like a bad mom but seriously, he can sometimes talk non-stop!

I have managed to remember a few funny things that he's said recently though.

Eli:I know a nickname for Danny.
Me: What?
Eli: Dan.
Me: Oh yeah.
Eli: A nickname for Mike is Crazy Mike.

After Eli made his blanket I told him he could take it over to Mikes house. He said, "what if Ally wants to cuddle?" And the tone was more like he was saying, "I hope Ally wants to cuddle." If you remember this post you will know why Mike was glad Ally wasn't home.

Since we are on the subject of Ally here are two more instances that lead me to believe Eli has a little crush on her.

We were talking about how Eli likes oatmeal at breakfast one morning. Eli said "yeah oatmeal is likable." I said "I think you are likable." Eli said "Ally is likable too."

At dinner one night Eli really thought the waitress was cute. On the way home he was talking about the waitress so I asked him what he thought was cute about her. He said "she had cute hair and circle earrings like Ally."

For the kicker. After church today Eli asked me why church was so boring and why is it hard for kids to sit still. I wish I had an answer for that!

Eli Says:

I am currently bedridden because I jacked up my back and am on percocet. We spent 3 hours at the ER last night to get some drugs and a diagnosis of lower back pain. This was funny (not haa haa funny) because the pain is not in my lower back but up in my upper back. It also wasn't funny how the ER wasn't busy and 4 hospital nurses/PA's stood around having a great time not working while I waited. Also I wanted a muscle relaxer and NOT pain killer but oh well.

Anyway, Eli has said some funny things lately. The other day when I asked him how he felt he said that he felt "lay downish." Which meant "I'm tired and want to lay down and watch cartoons."

Eli made a "that's what she said" joke. Of course he didn't mean to but it was funny. Eli has had a hard time adjusting to being back to KY because of the time change. He took a nap one day and then couldn't fall asleep that night. I told him that I shouldn't have let him take a nap. When Stewart said the same thing to him 20 minutes later Eli said, "that's what she said." Stewart about died laughing and was a little proud too.

Eli: Do you know why I'm not embarrassed to tell you that I love Elizabeth?
Me: No
Eli: You like Elizabeth, right?
Me: Yes
Eli: That's why I'm not embarrassed to tell you and Dad that I love Elizabeth.

We got up REALLY early to get to the airport and when I woke Eli up I said, "Eli we get to ride on an airplane!" (If you don't wake him up in a good mood you are going to be sorry for the rest of the day.) In his cute, just woken up voice he said, "I'm just excited to see Daddy again." AWWW it made me really happy that we were going to KY when I heard that.

I told Eli to get his coat on and he said/sang: "brr it's cold in here. I'm cold to my toes and up to my ears."

Most mornings Eli will come and cuddle me in bed for a few minutes. Since we have been back to KY he says, "I just can't stop cuddling you!"

And as usual, I can't remember a few more that I just KNEW I wouldn't forget.

Countdown to Christmas

Last Saturday Eli told me that on Sunday I could tickle him, Monday I could spank him (soft spanks), Tuesday I could bite his toes (tickle bites of course), Wednesday I could hug him.  Then he told me that I can do those things over and over again and on Christmas I can do all four things!  So I guess these will be my countdown to Christmas.  I can't wait until the day I get to do all four things.  What do you do to countdown to Christmas?

Christmas is Coming?

Here was my Eli Says: moment today

"Mom I have something to tell you and I'm afraid you are going to be really mad."

"What is it?"

"Ok, but will you cover your ears because I don't want to hear you scream."

"I promise I won't scream."  I don't scream anyway! I promise I'm not a terrible mother.

"I actually ate more of those little chocolates. Sorry mom, it was an accident. Am I going to get coal now?"

Apparently Eli didn't learn his lesson last year.

Both years he didn't make it past the 3rd before giving in to temptation. This year he got his calender on the 3rd though so it shows he has his mothers impatience.

I personally think that Eli thinks that if he can open all those doors early it will be Christmas sooner.  He has asked about when it will be Christmas non-stop since Thanksgiving. 

The Plan

Eli's becoming a sneaky crafty little boy. While I was innocently taking a nap yesterday Eli came up with this plan to trap me.

Me1 is me before the encounter. The trap is set with candy in the middle. Notice the rope and pulley system with Eli at the other end ready to pull the rope. Me2 is me caught in the trap.

Before I saw this plan Eli asked if we could go buy the things for his plan. I asked him what he needed and he told me.  I said "no." Eli then showed me the plan.  I was a little shocked to be the prey in this scheme of his!  He then said, "Mom are you ever going to buy me the things to make this plan?" I said "no" and he said, "ok, then just don't eat my candy!"  Hmm I didn't think that I'd eaten that much of his candy!

Don't you love my hair though?! Pretty crazy.

Eli Says:

We have had a few good ones lately.

While racing with Eli tonight, I was talking smack about how he is slow and he was going to lose. He said, "No I won't. I have 2 things to help me! Mr. Arms and Mr. Legs."

While eating dinner Saturday Eli said, "my brain wants healthy dinner but my mouth keeps thinking about candy!"

On Sunday we were practicing the primary program. Eli LOVES talking in a microphone. After he said his part he hurried and said "I love my mom."  I hope he really does that in the program! It was so cute. After his second part he said "I love my dad." Of course everyone was laughing.  I am NOT going to encourage it of course but I'm not necessarily going to go out of my way to tell him NOT to say it. :)

Shoot there was one more funny thing but now I can't remember it.  One of my friends says that she writes her son's funny sayings on a post-it note. I need to do that! 

Edited to add: Oh I just remembered!  Eli has been playing Lego Star Wars. His favorite character is T.T.2.tar. That is his way of pronouncing R2D2. It makes me laugh every time!

Love Our Enemies? Really?

In this scene a little boy is watching VeggieTales "Minnesota Cuke." A re-telling of the bible story about Sampson. His mother is sitting on the couch folding laundry. (Hard to believe but true!) The little boy runs to his mother with a look of incredulity on his face.

Little Boy: Actually, we are supposed to LOVE our enemies!

Mother: Yep

Little Boy: But that's CRAZY! They have spears and could kill us! They are bad guys! Why should we love our enemies? 

Some commandments are harder to obey then others.

*In case you didn't figure it out the little boy was Eli and the mother was me and I really was folding clothes.

This Blog May Rot Your Brain!

Sometimes I make Eli cry. I know, I'm really rude. Here is the story of how I made him cry Thursday.

We had been home most of the day, and weren't going to get to see Stewart so I figured we needed to get out of the house. There was a 9/11 concert here on post so I asked Eli if he wanted to go see it. He was watching cartoons and was so torn! He wanted to watch cartoons but he also wanted to go to the concert. He said that we could go to the concert later and I had to explain that we couldn't go later it was starting now and it would be over soon. So I said, "Eli, TV is going to rot your brain." Eli ran out of the room and started crying and holding his head. He was saying stuff like, "is my brain rotten?" and "I don't want my brain to rot." When I tried to get him to come in the room to talk to me he said, "I don't want to see the TV because it will rot my brain."

Ha ha I guess I know how to cure him of his TV addiction. It was so funny. I did feel a little bad because I didn't think that he'd actually understand what I was saying or take it to heart so much.

Another little naughty thing Eli did was last night he painted his arm with fingernail polish. He was supposed to be going to sleep in my bed. We put him to sleep in our room and then move him to the fold out bed in the front room when we are ready to go to bed. Well about an hour after I had put him him bed I heard him in the bathroom washing his hands. I'm sure the panic set in here when the polish wouldn't wash off with soap and water! I went in to check on him and felt his arm that had the nail polish on it. I said, "Eli what did you do?" He immediately stuck his fingers in his ears and started crying. I pulled his fingers out of his ears and asked him why he was doing that and he just kept saying that he needed to plug his ears. Finally he said that he didn't want to hear me yelling.

Since I was laughing at this point I don't know why he was crying and I really try not to yell anyway. I told him not to play with the nail polish and to go to bed. He cried and said, "what if I get distracted and I can't help it!" I guess the nail polish was calling his name and he just had no choice but to paint his arm. I removed the polish from the vicinity and he was able to fall asleep.

When Eli is spazing out and I tell him to calm down he sometimes says "I'm out of control!" He knows his weaknesses and I think that can be a strength!

Eli says:

He has been pretty dang cute lately and this post will be about funny things he has done as well.

Eli now opens my door about 70% of the time. It started with Stewart telling Eli that they had to help me get in the car. Then they started racing to see who could do it first and now Eli does it by himself a lot of the time. It's about the cutest thing I've seen. So now Eli's going to be a husband that opens doors AND sends flowers.

When we pulled up to go bowling Eli sighed and said "are we going bowling? That sounds boring." We know for a fact that Eli loves to go bowling. We, of course, said that if he didn't want to go bowling we would go home. He replied begrudgingly that he would go bowling even though you can tell thta he really wanted to go. I call these "teenage moments." I don't know why he is having them now at this age but it drives me nuts. Why does he have to think he's too cool for stuff already?

While watching cartoons the other day Eli asked if he could eat some spinach when we got home from church. The boy on the commercial ate spinach and got super powers so Eli thinks that it's true. He also has to drink a Coolaid Jammer when he sees that commercial.

When Eli talks on the phone he can't hold still. Instead of pacing like Stewart he runs back and forth in the front room. It's pretty funny to watch.

After getting ready for preschool on Wednesday Eli said "I think I'll be the coolest kid in town." He was wearing Transformer shoes and a Transformer shirt and he had his Thomas book bag full of his cool school supplies. That is pretty dang cool!

When Stewart and I are in the car Eli will come up from the back seat and put his arms around our shoulders and say "let's hug each other." It's SO cute.

Too Much TV?

Eli was reading one of his books and it was introducing the question mark. We have read this book long ago but we are going back to the beginning of the Bob Book series because halfway through the 2nd set got too hard. Anyway I asked him, "do you know what this is called?" as I pointed at the question mark. Eli said, "A MOUSKATOOL!" all I could say for a sec was "ummm...no." But in smart news he can read it with inflection in his voice which I think is cool.